Tuesday, January 13, 2009

does it ever get better?

Well...a couple of weeks ago I found out I was pregnant. The number started low, but they kept going up and doubling normally, so the doctors were very optimistic. I did the ultrasound yesterday and found out it was ectopic. Today I had to come back to the doctor to get a shot done, which basically is a cancer drug and will kill the pregnancy. Why me? Meanwhile, my brother-in-law & sister-in-law who are younger than me and got married after, had a baby boy, and we went to the bris last week. And we had to be kvatter. I really didn't want to - since I'm against it, but they asked my husband at the last minute, and he didn't know how to say no. Meanwhile I have the pidyan haben to go to in a couple of weeks, and I don't know if I can bear to go. Obviously I will, but it's really hard. Why couldn't the pregnancy have just worked this time. Is that too much to ask for?